A Self Care Guide to Finding Balance When They’re Away

When your partner is deployed or away for work, the house gets quieter, the responsibilities get louder, and your thoughts can spiral if you let them. Being solo doesn’t have to mean being lonely, though — this time can become an opportunity to steady yourself, stay grounded, and even enjoy parts of life that usually get pushed aside.

Think of this as your gentle guide to keeping your balance while you’re holding down the fort.

If you have a dog, make friends with neighbours who do too.
Dog playdates at the park are wildly underrated for your mental health — trust me, they are so worth it. I started doing this with my own dog and not only did he burn off energy, but I made easy, low-pressure connections with people who instantly had something in common with me.

Read more — and make it easy on yourself.
Create a profile on GoodReads so books can be suggested based on what you actually like, not what you feel you should be reading. Once you’ve got your list, most libraries will now let you reserve books online for quick pick-up, which removes the mental load of browsing when you’re already tired.

Try meditation apps without pressure to be perfect.
Insight Timer, Headspace, and Calm all have free versions, which means you can explore without committing to anything fancy. Even five minutes of breathing or a short, guided session can help calm the nervous system when the quiet feels too loud. For an additional distraction, many of these apps also offer short courses for personal growth if you’re looking for something that can ease you into a little more commitment.

Watch what they would never watch.
This is your time to reclaim the remote, and I promise there will be something your partner would hate that you’ll secretly love. Before you read on, I want you to pause, pull out your phone and schedule a memo in your calendar to put together a watchlist of all of the series or movies you’ve been meaning to start. This productive measure will ensure that you always have something ready, rather than starting the task whilst you’re in the throws overwhelm and gloom. On that note, I recommend leaning into feel-good series that lift your mood instead of draining it. My top pics are Ted Lasso (Apple TV), Shrinking (Apple TV), Schitt’s Creek (Netflix) and Upper Middle Bogan (Netflix).

Eat the foods you genuinely enjoy.
This is your chance to cook what you crave without negotiation or compromise. Whether it’s comfort food or adventurous flavours, feeding yourself well is a simple way to care for your body and boost your mood.

Learn a language you’ve always wanted to try.
This gives your brain something new and positive to focus on instead of running laps around worst-case scenarios. Even ten minutes a day creates structure and a sense of progress when life feels paused.

Do something creative with your hands.
Arts and crafts don’t have to be perfect or productive — they just need to be absorbing. Using your hands in a focused, repetitive way helps activate your parasympathetic nervous system, which is responsible for calming your body and restoring that reassuring “I’m in control” feeling when your thoughts feel scattered.

Start a WhatsApp group with local women.
It doesn’t have to be deep or dramatic — even a “coffee anyone?” group can change how connected you feel. Knowing there are people nearby who understand the lifestyle makes solo periods feel far less heavy.

Keep a gratitude journal (even when it feels silly).
There will always be something to write down, even on the hardest days. When emotions flood in, this practice acts like a little life buoy — pulling your attention back toward calmer water instead of letting you sink into everything that feels wrong.

Ask yourself: “What’s something I loved doing as a teenager that I’ve stopped making time for?”
Often the answer is simple — music, dancing, writing, or sport — but the effect is powerful. Revisiting old joys reconnects you with parts of yourself that existed before responsibilities took over. You might think, “But will I even like it now?” — and honestly, that’s part of the fun of finding out. The best advice for what’s right for you is usually your own, and whether it comes from past-you or present-you, the blueprint is often the same.

Choose events that feel comfortable to attend solo.
Sip-and-paint nights, markets, museum talks, and community events are perfect because you don’t need to bring a plus-one. You can show up, blend in, and leave whenever your social battery says it’s time.

Keep an ‘Experiences Jar’.
Write down small ideas for things you can do when days feel long — walks, cafés, movies, craft projects, or trips. On tough days, pull one out so you don’t have to decide when your brain is already tired.

Being on your own while your partner is away doesn’t mean you have to white-knuckle your way through it. Staying grounded and in control isn’t about staying busy every minute — it’s about giving your mind and body enough support so the spiral doesn’t take over. Little rituals, small connections, and gentle structure can turn this time into something that feels steady instead of overwhelming.

As always, if your body is asking for a little more support and you would like to know how Naturopathy can help you navigate your health, you can book your free discovery call with Prue here.